SAPIENTIA
Stabilize Stress
Stress is a killer.
There are some who would say, "there's good stress and then
there's bad stress". That's sort of like saying, "there are
good heart attacks and then there are bad heart attacks".
Maybe there is some positive benefit to the stresses that
will enhance our performance, but, for the most part, stress
is a negative, keeping us from performing at peak levels,
damaging our daily productivity, and decreasing the chances
of our longevity.
Many blame stress on external forces. "We are living in
stressful times." "This is a stressful job." "My boss
(husband, wife, co-worker, customer, client, kid, etc.) is
really stressing me out."
The world is not really a stressful place and these are not
really stressful times. There really are no stressful jobs.
If any of these were true, then everyone in that community,
job, relationship, etc. would be stressed. Some are. Maybe
most are. But some are not.
There are many "stress reduction" programs, seminars, and
courses out there. Most are effective. But, rather than
treat the symptoms, what if we treated the disease and rid
ourselves of the causes of the stress?
Most stress is internal, caused by the ways in which we
relate to the world and events and people around ourselves.
Stress is caused when there is a disconnect between our
expectation and our reality. When reality falls short of an
expectation, it creates a disappointment and that causes
stress.
For example, let us say you drove your car to work today,
your car was parked in the nearby parking lot, and you will
leave work today at 5:00 p.m. You probably have an
expectation that your car will be right where you left it
when you got to the parking lot this afternoon. Well, what
if you were to discover at 5:00 p.m. that your car has been
stolen? I would imagine most of us would feel some stress
from finding out about our stolen car!
But, what if you return to the parking lot this afternoon
and there is your car exactly where you left it this
morning? You insert the key and drive away. Do you
experience stress over finding your car where you left it?
No, because expectation and reality match up.
While most of us will experience those larger
disappointments in life, they are typically few and far
between so that our bodies have a chance to cope and
recover. Rather, it is all the little disappointments, which
seem inconsequential individually, but when added together
throughout a day, will really build up the stress. (Dealing
with the morning rush hour, not getting things done on time,
tasks piling up, personal errands not attended to, etc.)
The solution? Bring your realities up to your expectations.
How? Through effective Daily Planning. Make sure that you
plan to do the little things you want and expect should be
done in addition to all the things you "have to" do during
the day. Prioritize the list and tackle them in the order of
their importance to you.
We will never eliminate stress completely but, with more
effective planning, we can reduce and stabilize stress.
Written by Dr. Donald E. Wetmore